Muchas veces pensamos que ya perdonamos pero nos queda la herida que pareciera no sanar. En 8 pasos explico como realmente sanar, perdonar y dejar ir con entendimiento y compasion.
In a study published in October 2018, experts agree that chronic stress is the leading cause of medical, mental, work, and relationship issues. A moderate amount of stress can motivate you to accomplish tasks, but consistently high levels of stress can alter your physical and mental health, hurting your perceptions and damaging your relationships.
Below are six statistics about the effects of stress and practical solutions to improve your wellbeing.
Are you feeling stressed about something you can’t control? Is your mind going over all of the possible scenarios and conversations you could have? Does it feel like you can’t catch your breath and your mind is racing?
Take a slow deep breath in and out.
I’m here to help you.
You’ve probably heard people say, “don’t worry about it!”, “let it go!”, or “just breathe”. As if it were that easy to quiet the monkey mind (the monkey mind is a Buddhist term for an unsettled mind). The truth is, you cannot jump from obsessing about something, to just simply letting it go. It’s like asking you to get off a roller coaster ride and immediately go into a library and be extra quiet, it takes time and skills.
Why is it so hard to quiet the mind? Because your entire nervous system is in fight or flight mode, seeking solutions for a situation that is triggering feelings of insecurity and anxiety. Your heart is beating fast, your mind is racing, your breath shallow, you can’t focus, and you are feeling out of control. The anxiety takes over your mind, body, and emotions and in order to calm your mind, you need to address this in practical ways.
Don’t despair. I’m going to share with you 3 valuable and practical steps that have helped me (and my clients) calm the body, quiet the mind, and let go of anxiety. Practice these skills and let me know in the comments below which ones worked best for you, or if you have a preferred method that you’d like to share.
Step 1: Shift your physicality
Stress tends to get stuck in the physical body, so in order to change how you feel or perceive a situation, you must change your physicality first. How do you shift from high stress to lesser stress? Here are some suggestions to practice this first step:
- Go for a walk or work out
- Listen to an upbeat song and dance to it
- Take a nap or a cold shower
- Get busy with projects you need to complete
- Take 10 slow, deep breaths
- Drink water/relaxing tea
- Put your bare feet on the ground
- Listen to empowering podcasts/audios/videos
- Watch a comedy show
Step 2: Connect with your inner self
You become anxious about a situation because of the perceived consequences it may have in your life. You try to control the outcome or predict what could happen, but when you look deep within, you discover that what you are trying to so is avoid rejection, disappointment, or abandonment. Practice this next step by connecting to your deepest needs:
- Have a good cry
- Put your hand over your heart and talk to your inner self with compassion
- Ask yourself how you would like to feel instead
- Ask how you can give this to yourself
- Allow yourself to feel your emotions safely
- Be kind to yourself
- Pet an animal
Step 3: Surrender
When you have expectations about the way things should be, how people should behave, or how life should go, you set yourself up for disappointment and suffering. Trying to control situations or people so you don’t get hurt is not a realistic or genuine way of living (I’ve tried!). The only thing you can control is how you respond to situations, your feeling, and your decisions. Below are some suggestions to help you move to the third step to free yourself from an anxious mind.
- Let go of the need to know the answer, control, or be right
- Know that you’ll be OK regardless
- Give it up to God
- Know that you have no control over how other people feel or react
- Know that there is a bigger plan
- As yourself what is the lesson
- Let go of expectations
- Do self-care
- Be kind to yourself and others
- Be present
Practice these skills as often as possible to help you quiet your monkey mind. The more connected you are to your inner self, the more you’ll understand your triggers and how to be present with your emotions. By being present you release the need to control your current situation and stop judging it based on your past or your future expectations.
Surrendering is the tool that brings you the most peace but only after you have shifted the physical stress and acknowledged your feelings. Surrendering means letting go of control and trusting that you’ll be OK no matter what, and allowing your path to unfold.
If you need additional help with this, contact me.
Nancy De Andrade, PhD
Are you feeling stressed, irritable, exhausted, upset, or lost? Here is a technique for you.
The Over-Energy Correction or Wayne Cook posture was developed by Dr. Wayne Cook, a researcher of the human body’s electrochemical, biomagnetic and psychoenergetic force fields. His technique was designed to help people with symptoms of Tourettes, Dyslexia, ADHD, as well as anxiety, irritability, and other strong and overwhelming emotions. This posture forms an energetic shape in the form of an 8 or a double helix -like in the DNA, crossing over brain hemisphere functions and meridian lines. This posture corrects the natural energy flow in the body that was disrupted by a trigger or an intense emotion and helps calm the nervous system.
If you are feeling anxious, angry, or upset, practice this technique for 2 mins. It will help you calm down and rebalance your energy in no time!
Over-Energy Correction or Wayne Cook Posture
- Stand or sit and cross your right ankle over your left ankle.
- Extend your arms in front of you and turn your palms to face out.
- Cross your left arm over your right arm. Clasp your hands together, interlace your fingers, and fold your arms inward to rest on your chest. Relax your shoulders.
- Place the tip of your tongue on the roof of your mouth as you breath in, and drop the tongue as you exhale. This connects the governing and central meridians as your energy begins to flow in a figure 8.
- Breathe in and out slowly for about 2 mins and notice any shifts in your energy and nervous system.
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What does it mean to walk the talk? In this interview, Kate asks important questions about being in alignment and authentic in the way you show up in this world.
We can’t continue pretending that we can do it all, that we are always strong and in control, that we are not bothered by the back-breaking struggles we face in this life. We know there are solutions but can’t see them because they hide underneath unshed tears.
Sometimes you just need to talk to someone who won’t judge you, who asks the right questions that open the flood gates of your innermost sorrows.
Someone to witness your pain so you know that you are not crazy for feeling your feelings.
Someone to hold the space for you to break down without feeling pity for you or see you as less capable just because you opened up, because you put the load you’ve been carrying down to break open.
Sometimes you need someone who won’t try to fix you or stop you from feeling because they are uncomfortable, but who will hold a safe space for you to be vulnerable.
Sometimes that someone is a counselor, or a friend. Sometimes is paper and pen.
If you need someone, contact me for an appointment.
My favorite place to flow is in front of the vast ocean. It reminds me of the abundance we enjoy as humans and it connects me with profound wisdom I cannot find inside the walls of my home. The ocean teaches me to go with the flow. Even with its unpredictable waves and currents, it is a great teacher for acceptance and surrendering.
If you speak to surfers they will tell you the ocean brings them a sense of peace and at the same time excitement. They’ll tell you that the simple act of waiting for the right wave creates a sense of communion with nature, and the embrace of its waters makes them feel like they belong.
How does this relate with going with the flow? Surfers do not go against the current but wait to be taken away by the resistance and flow of the wave. They do not judge a wave when is less than ideal for a ride, they learn to manage it, floating above it or ducking under. They don’t stress about when the next wave will come because they trust another one will come at any moment.
They bask in the silent rocking of this blissful moment.
This surrendering to the moment and being completely present with yourself without judgments or expectations is where you find the flow. It is not forcing the situation to conform to your expectations and desires, but becoming aware of the opportunities that come your way, learning about your innate desires and limitations, and accepting the whole of you with respect and compassion.
Going with the flow is knowing yourself, it’s healing your wounds, and soothing your discomfort. Going with the flow is listening to guidance, the one that speaks inside your being with infinite wisdom. Going with the flow is allowing and trusting that things happen for a reason and to keep your eyes open for the next wave. Going with the flow is hoping, believing, trusting without attachments or judgments. Going with the flow is sitting in stillness and noticing that you can be moved by inspiration or force, you decide. Going with the flow is finding power in releasing. Going with the flow is letting go.
Did you know?
The movement of natural water produces negative ions that improve your mood. Exposure to electronics, fluorescent lights, etc, charges our bodies with too many positive ions which dysregulates our nervous system. Exposure to negative ions found in nature, reestablishes the balance of ions and in addition increases the production of serotonin, a feel-good hormone crucial for the management of anxiety.
Not only being around water is helpful, but safe exposure to sunlight increases the production of Vit D and consequently Melatonin, both important in regulation of sleep and management of depression.
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What is Plant Medicine?
Anne Salazar, RH, AHG is the Lead Practitioner (Registered Clinical Herbalist) at Pharmaca Integrative Pharmacy with 12 years as a Therapeutic Herbalist, and a background on Western and Chinese herbal medicine.
In this interview, Anne shares her knowledge and wisdom on the healing powers of plant medicine, its common uses, and the spirituality practices when working with herbs.
Subscribe to my YouTube channel so you don’t miss my next interview with a gifted soul who will be sharing with us her journey of discovering what lies beneath illness and how changing your thoughts can change your health. Interview coming up on June 28th at 6:30pm.
This is a short video with a simple yet powerful technique to connect to your guidance and ask the right question to find your purpose. I hope you practice it!
Have you ever felt like a fraud? Have you ever feared that one day everyone will find out who you truly are, that you don’t know as much, and are not as good as they think?
I have spent countless amount of time and energy making sure that what I say or do is always correct. I thought it was a sign of intelligence and striving to improve myself. I thought it was a challenge to rise above mediocrity and educate myself ad nauseam.
What I didn’t realize was that I was actually relentlessly destroying my self-confidence.
This constant search for the absolute truth was only creating more doubts. The famous saying, “I know one thing, that I know nothing” always rang true. I learned to challenge everything, including my own beliefs, likes and dislikes. I learned to research and study to no end, to the point that I didn’t stand for anything with passion because “there is always another point of view that I might not have considered”.
Heaven forbid I’m wrong! Being wrong was actually deadly in my mind.
It took me many years to realize that I cannot waver in fear just because someone doesn’t agree with me or because I might not know it all. Fear keeps us away from our passion and purpose. Trusting, the opposite of fear, doesn’t mean we don’t make a stand for what we believe, it means letting guidance show us the way.
By relinquishing the need to be right I was able to trust the unfoldment of events as they are meant to occur. Trusting is easy when things go well, not so easy when challenges exist, but when I don’t trust, I lose control; when I try to control, I go into fear -a deadly, nasty, vicious cycle.
I realize that my mission is to stand strong in my belief in Divine Guidance and share my experience of love and light with others. In my practice I try to see my clients’ life from their point of view and try to find the “right” course. In my most powerful sessions, I have relied on my spiritual guidance to find the path that best serves my clients, not the path my mind believes they should follow.
The same way I teach others to trust their guidance, I too must stand in this undeniable truth that we are guided. I have seen miracles happen when I’m in the sanctuary I create for my clients and we surrender to guidance. In that space, there is no right or wrong, but a deep trust that things happen for a reason. In that space it is not about being confident of my own abilities but confident in the Divine guidance we are receiving.
Wishing you confidence, passion, guidance and trust,